N/A

被美國室友氣的冒煙

其實就是有關宿舍錢 合約的問題
昨晚的talk 其實很不愉快
不過  我很訝異自己的態度
以前 我都是隨便 沒意見 什麼都好
這次我竟然把意見大聲的說出來

法國室友要離開了
空一個房間
照理講是學校的事 
美國室友要求我們簽under occupancy 的合約
就是剩下的三個人攤四個人的錢
直到我們找到人搬進來
反之  學校可以放需要宿舍的學生進來住
對我來講  誰進來住都沒差
把責任留給學校比較省事
這樣 一個月我要多付一萬多台幣左右
如果我知道一定租的出去就算了
這個房間蠻小的  我們的flat 實在很不怎麼樣
沒有客廳沒有洗衣機 要出去洗
我覺得會很難租

Anyway, we had a rather unplesant talk.
不喜愛美國人霸氣自以為是的態度
至少這個是這樣的!!!
She really drives me mad!

太難相信啦
My application to the workshop in Greece has been accepted and I have been awarded with a fellowship which will cover all the cost.

Apparently, only 40 PhD & post-docs are selected from the world to attend this meeting.  I feel very privileged and lucky too, consider my application was late and was not checked by supervisor.

The funny thing is I will go to Greece again (Rhodes) for a wedding/holiday a week after the conference.  應該會曬得很黑吧

誇張的是我七月初要回紐西蘭三個禮拜左右
沒有博士生像我這麼混吧
and this is my last year!

寫論文難不難呢
難
因為它太大本了
三年的東西要放到一本
忘記愛丁堡大學的字數限制是多少
反正我是絕對不會超過
今天難得天氣好
實驗室沒有人
沒有人打擾  太感動了
把自己關在辦公室
一個下午加一個網上只寫了兩小章
以這個速度  九月底是絕對交不出來的

還有些煩人的事
有些挑戰要去面對

有時候真的會覺得孤單
我自己去過海邊看海耶
也自己爬過山
大部分的城堡都是自己去的

有時候 要ㄍ一ㄥ著
不能太多感情
上次腳受傷 腫著腳從宿舍跳去看醫生
我都是笑笑的
直到到醫院在等的時候
看看每一個等的人 都有家人在旁邊
有男女朋友 女生腳受傷了 男朋友在旁邊照顧
雖然同事聽到了馬上說要來陪我
心裡真的有點小難過
自己坐在醫院等
眼睛不知不覺紅了起來
大概三秒鐘吧
自己又得把情緒收起來
不然真的會哭得不可收拾
勇敢都是用裝的啦

其他的東西下次再寫囉

姍姍來遲的瑛 被老師遇到
看到我第一句話就問 看到email 了沒
老師  我茶都還沒泡呢 怎麼有機會看妳的email 呢
她一臉寧重的問我 我都怎麼clone 我的constructs
聽完我解釋後  她問我這樣怎麼會work
我被嚇了一跳
從來沒有想過這個問題
可是大家好像都是這樣做
我的臉愈來愈沒血色
因為我從來沒有讀這方面的東西  從來沒想過這樣做有什麼問題
從背脊涼下來
shit
我三年來所有的cloning 都是這樣做的

老師很客氣  但也很直接
抱歉 妳得全部重做
我就算不回家  住在實驗室也做不完

接下來就是責任推卸了
She said she has never seen my other cloning plans etc etc
最糟糕的是 下午我要去另一個實驗室
用其中一個construct 做一個stable cell line
老師說 這是a waste of time
And she will write to the collaborator to explain my stupidness...
這下丟臉丟大了.......

幾番波折後
老師錯了  我的cloning 沒有問題
真的好險 
不敢去想要是真的錯了要重做  我有沒有這個勇氣和耐心

學到什麼呢
就是自己要為自己的實驗負責
因為到時候口試被grill 的是我
和supervisor 之間是一個很微妙的關係
大部分的時候  I won't challenge her ideas or decisions...
但是我應該要speak up

A narrow miss!!!
昨晚睡不好  照理講應該可以放心了
可是做了一晚很奇怪的夢
瑛平常都睡得很好
做了一晚夢 
夢中一會要interview  一會要表演體操(?!?!??)
醒過來好累
呆會要去pub...

同事要結婚了
她小姐要到希臘結婚
她和未婚夫都是道地的英國人
到希臘結婚比在英國結婚便宜太多了
一方面又可以順便在希臘度蜜月

禮拜五喝的微醺的瑛滿口答應一定去
醒過來才想到九月中我應該正和論文奮鬥
不管了 去吧

九月初在希臘有個conference
原本以為是只要報名就能參加
剛才仔細看了才知道是要selection
而截止日期是昨天
有點懊惱自己的粗心
不然conference 結束後
希臘愛情海眾小島玩一玩剛好參加婚禮
想到蔚藍的海  白色的沙灘
不過應該會是自己去 說不怕是騙人的
想到第一年宿舍遇到的希臘人..... (dear.......)

This will be the start of my trip in Europe!
想去巴黎, Nice, 布拉格, 羅馬和巴塞隆納也想去, 德國到還好
ㄚ 怎麼能忘了瑞士和奧地利呢
我要開始玩囉!!

論文加油 加油!!!!

話說跛腳的瑛好久都不能去跳aerobic
陽光普照的週六決定去游泳池晃晃
週六午餐後  整個游泳池只有兩三個人 
臭氧消毒的游泳池沒有一般游泳池刺鼻的氯味
其實我還是不能用腳游泳
(不用腳叫我怎麼游ㄚ)
exercise instructor 教我用腳夾著會浮的東西
然後用手做breast stroke
ya ya ya, 說的簡單
我一下水  照著他說的做  臀部就翹起來
救生員 關愛的眼光就照過來
因為我怎麼看 都像是溺水的人
原本是靠在池邊的救生員
他一看我下水  就爬上救生員坐的高高椅子
一付聚精會神等著救我的樣子
實在太可恥了  於是把浮板一踢  我就酷酷開始划起我自豪的抬頭蛙
真的很舒服  陽光從落地窗灑下來
一邊划  還可以看到窗外的草地

我是passive exercise 的擁護者
所謂passive exercise 就是像蒸氣室啦  桑拿啦
雖然不用動 但是還是會出汗  心跳也會加快  而且可以促進血液循環  所以應該是有運動到 (歪理一大堆)

然後我就跑到sona 去烤囉
進去後正準備閉上眼睛好好relax
眼角喵到一個棕色倒三角的身影推門進來
仔細一看
ㄚ 是我非常仰慕(or 哈0的 instructor!!!
他教Pump,
每週四晚上  我都風雪無阻地去上他的課
他的肌肉不用講了
pump 都穿一條超短的小短褲  真的很短
加上一件緊身的背心
我想他也不是故意要穿緊身的
因為身材太好了  背心就變得很貼身
貼身到可以看到腹肌的形狀
在做abdominal work 時 
要是我剛好在前面的話 我就真的要閉眼睛
他的臉也是帥的不得了
I will be very surprised if he doesn't do any modeling!!!
像他這樣 有一千個理由認為自己很帥 and turn himself into a person with nasty personality!
可是他的個性 實在很charming!!!
非常和善 好笑
Anyway, he is absolutely fantastic!!!
And his classes are very organised and you are guaraented to have a good workout.
於是瑛原本烤的紅紅的臉就更紅了

沒有啦 我很大方的
可愛的stewart 一開始就開玩笑問怎麼很久沒有看到我去pump
那我就不客氣 把我丟臉受傷的經過講給他聽囉
And he gave me plenty of sympathy!

-------------------------------
星期日  我又欺負一個台灣來的醫生(主治醫師)
每次說喝個咖啡 就變成吃飯
每次都是他請客
真的很不好意思
他說 在台灣都是男生請客
(台灣我也住過ㄚ)
這樣台灣的男生不是很可憐嗎
或是說台灣的女生實在是太幸福了
(英國或紐西蘭都是各付各的)

Time to sleep.....

這年頭的學生  真不知道該怎麼形容
話說有個難得的機會教醫學院第一年的學生
用教這個字 實在是太高沽我自己了
套句老爸老媽的話  是去誤人子弟

是PBL (Problem Based learning)  像討論課 
會有一個病例  學生看了以後大家一起討論
一方面是學解決問題 找答案的方法 
一方面是訓練學生口才 和人相處的方法

所以囉 帶著惶恐的心情 就開始我誤人子弟的工作
說誤人子弟  是真的沒有誇張 
醫學知識多浩瀚ㄚ  怎是我能是先預備的呢
而且都是討論爭議不休時那種很奇怪的問題
通常都是週五下午三小時的課  兩個倒楣的班被我帶到
所以禮拜四晚上 瑛就在惡補啦 
學生學什麼 我週四晚上就學什麼
當然 決大部分他們的疑問我都沒有辦法有什麼好的答案
ㄟ 這對我來講很有挫折感耶
所以週五上完課 我都是帶著深深的罪惡感回家
只有一兩次  算數學問題時 我能幫忙  還有問到基因遺傳方面 我就能侃侃而談

對這些愛丁堡醫學院的學生 
不管他們是不是天之驕子
有些真的很驕傲
尤其是特殊幾個男生  據說這些通常都會當surgeon (no offence)
我是真的很佩服
他們整合的能力 真的很強
還有記憶力  編課的老師自己說的  像錄音機一樣  你講什麼 他們聽一遍就能一字不露背出來給你聽
我是對這一群聰明的小朋友佩服的不得了
而且每一個都超成熟專業的
有時候我真的很想抗議  喂 你們才 17,18歲耶
說真的  專業都是裝出來的
所謂專業 就是他們用的一些字 和形容事 情的方法 都很像大人
他們用的英文字 跟時下年輕人都不一樣
非常有禮貌
感覺的出來家教很好
有統計調查指出愛丁堡大學的學生 較小部分是從working class family
沒錯  英國還是講階級的

說真的 一直覺得愛丁堡大學的學生沒有想像中的好
只是從其他念博士的學生感覺不出來
這些學生 有一大部分是英國Welcome Trust funded 的學生
在念分生這一方面  這些學生是英國 tops of the top!!!!
But too many times, I have to help them with molar concentrations etc.
It is just shocking!

階級方面的問題 愛丁堡跟劍橋 牛津比起來應該是好很多
說到劍橋大學  第一年的時候遇到兩個劍橋大學醫學系第五年的兩個男生
什麼叫做 紳士??
吃晚餐時這兩位帥哥坐在我旁邊
後來跳舞時  我太客氣了  喪失和其中一位跳整晚舞的機會
我竟然把他讓給另外一位女生
非常紳士可是真的很可愛

說到主題  今天我到了教室後才有學生來跟我說
'they decided to cancel the class today because they felt they have covered most of the stuff they wanted to cover in the previous session'....

接著第二班竟然有人打我的手機 說課取消了
他們怎麼有我手機號碼
學校秘書也沒有我的號碼 他們怎麼找到我的號碼
超詭異的

所以 今天放假一,天 and I have no intention to go back to the lab on this beautiful Friday.....

雖然我心裡煩得想殺人...........

腳痛不能運動
看來今天晚上要到游泳池報到,
別在sona 裡睡著了就好  不然出來的時候可能會像prune...

Walking with Abby to the Gym on a crispy sharp cold night, with the moon hanging in the sky.
Abby pointed to a star: Look! That is a planet! (with her scottish accent!)
I said, 'Yape! That's where I used to live!'
Abby, 'I always think you are a bit strange!'

Nice to have a friend who can share my humour!
I think I will miss Edinburgh when I leave...

(If the right person occurs... I will stay!!)

This is my first time came across of the phrase... and it hurted me...

This woman said, 'He fell out of love with me, I didn't.' I think I know how she felt...

It is hard to imagine how/why love comes and then love goes... Not for me...

The guy said, ' the guilt will only go on the day when she finds another guy'...

Guilt is not necessarily equal to care...

In a relationship, I am the blind one...

Sometimes, I blame myself...

I thought, if I love him, he would love me too...

Fabulous double decked Edinburgh bus drivers decided to have a strike this weekend, i.e. no buses running in Edinburgh at all. There is another bus company in Edinburgh but their bus routes do not cover a very big range. The weather on Sat was awful so I decided to stay in the flat, plus a guy is coming to see the flat at 7pm. I gave the flat (and my room) a big cleaning and I baked banana scone! How good is that?! The guy is all right. He is from London, a bit shy but seems to be nice. He reminds me about another friend called Michael (similar accent). After he left, we (3 girls) had a discussion. Basically, three of us are single (Natalia's bf has gone back to US and they decided to 'take easy'). Three single girls and one OK looking guy... hm.... not so good idea. But we will see. I feel I can live with him. But there will be no more walking to shower with nothing on but a towel.

Sunday turned out to be a nice day. I was wearing wooly jumper and socks a day before (and still looked purple). I can't stand staying in the flat doing nothing. So I decided to walk to the lab (one hour each way). Believe me, it is a long way. Two other PhD girls were working in the office as well. I have a very bad habit: I can't concentrate when there are people beside me. So instead of marking around on computer as I always do if I was by myself, I went to look at my RNAi transfected slides. Very interesting result, but I should check again before I become too happy (this has happened a couple times. Over joyed and then found out it was a false result. I've learnt my lessons). Keep it quiet till you are really sure about it, otherwise you are just causing yourself unnecessary troubles. (Group members hate you when you have good results), sad, I know...

Then I went for a swim! I arrived when there were hardly anyone in the pool (me and another person!) The pool is fabulous!!!! (no smelly chlorine which makes your skin rash. The pool uses 'ozone' for cleaning. No smell at all. Actually, the pool smells very perfumery.) Lifeguard was bored and said hello to me (and almost made me drown! I can't talk while I am swimming!) I was going to swim for 20 lanes (5 km) but stopped at 16 because I realised the lifeguard walks faster than I swim!! (haha!) So I went to the steam room for 10 min, followed by a warm wash to wash away the waste, then another 10 min of sauna, followed by a cold shower to close the pores. I need this to get rid off the alcohol/cigarett from pub night on Friday.

Here comes the worse part, I am tired and feel relaxed (you know the feeling after exercise) but now I have to find my way home. There is no other way except walk (and it is uphill!) I can see castle, standing high on the hill. After I get to castle, it is only half way. And I made it: and I was hungry!

Russian flatmate made this wonderful mushroom pie and it is for us to sample. It is the best pie I ever tasted! I still cooked curry (the only thing I am good at cooking) and had curry with Veronica.

Now it is 10:45pm and I want to go to bed, although I have to catch up on some yeast two hybrid reading. Perhaps I will wake up eariler tomorrow and do the readings before I go to work. It is another busy day but lots connection with people. Sometimes I feel I have to 'physically' switch on the socilising switch as soon as I step into the building (put a smile on the face, chat to people, make jokes etc). Do I have autism? maybe... Actually, autism might be a form of extrem where our brain tries hard to make it like a 'male' brain. I am too sleepy to expand on this paragrah and should stop here. Bye for now.

To celebrate my birthday, we went out for a meal. I was wanting to have food and then go home and chill out.  The night out eating almost turned into a hen's party!

I have never drank this much in my life. I wasn't feeling too well before we went out. There are some serious problems between my supervisor and me and I felt depressed. We got to the pub, and I drank a bottle of Spanish beer very quickly. Normally, a bottle of beer would knock me off.  We waved goodbye to people who can only make for a drink and jumped on the bus heading to an Italian restaurant.

We ordered food and a bottle of wine to share between four people. Glass got emptied very quickly. We ordered another bottle of wine. Drank very quickly. Then we ordered dessert with alcohol (brandy and vodka). Drank/eaten very quickly. I was quite drunk already. The last thing caught at the corner of my eye before we headed to a pub was a waitor spoon-feeding one of a female customers sitting at the table beside us.

Before I can do anything, the cork of a bottle of champaign was popped! Great atmoshpere! By the time when I had another top-up of the champaign, I was at the verge of throwing out.

Then the ballon came out, it went very wild! The ballon! (Oh dear....) I had to cover it with my jacket to take it with me back to the flat across the road.

Straight into bed, unconcious.

Managed to drag myself to the lab and did some experiments at 9:30am, rather impressed.